still broken, but im mending

today i did fucking nothing, and my plans for tonight and still fucking nothing. barnett makes me smile. thanks everyone who has listened to me rant, :). its been fun. its really weird i guess because this is the worst part of a break up, watching the person you once loved more than anything be with another girl. on the one side you would wish that it would just end and they would both be miserable. dont worry matts new 'friend' i dont hate you. actually when i met you i liked you, and a bonus is you are pretty hot i guess. lol. so anyways back on topic, i honestly just didnt think that he would be able to move on so fast thats why i was suprised/hurt.its okay though because on the other hand im happy for him, i want him to find happiness and i want him to be able to love again. im not saying that he loves her or anything so please dont assume that but in the end i just want him to be happy.i feel that i am happy right now. the break up was the probably the best and worst thing for me. i knew that our relationship wasnt how it used to be but then i didnt want to just throw all the love i had for him. i guess that him ending it was a pretty hard thing to do because he probably knew that i never would.ill say that it was the worst thing only because i had so much faith in us and our relationship. and i just wanted us to work things out, its okay tho. im fine now. :)